….a week ago and prior, I was so nerve-wracked and on the fence on whether or not to share what I crafted.
But now, after a few interactions outside of my bedroom and after seeing posts from people carrying their own spark, that fear is 100% gone. I’m ready to release it-or so I thought. Then I missed my self-proposed deadline and I was furious.
Agitated. Miffed. Blowing volumes of steam from my mouth and ears.
And now? I’m calm yet lackadaisical. I calmed down enough to hope that there is something beautiful awaiting me in the delay, but now…I have become afraid to touch it again. What am I even doing? I don’t know. I just keep clicking things hoping what sounds nice to me will sound nice to at least one other pair of ears. I still feel ready to share, but I know I’m not finished yet. This time unattainable perfection isn’t holding me back, it’s just me pushing against a door that has a sign that clearly reads “pull to open.”